Welcome back to PeaceSmart Relationships.  In this session we continue our discussion, the last leg of the Reconciliation Triangle, which is Freely Forgive.

Sin has been confronted and exposed, it's been confessed, and now we have an opportunity to extend forgiveness to those who have confessed to us.  Recognize it as a follower of Jesus Christ; forgiveness is a command, not an option. 

In Luke chapter 17:3-4 we read, "So watch yourselves.  If your brother or sister sins against you rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them.  Even if they sin against you seven times in a day, and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them." 

In Matthew 18, Peter is responding to the Lord's parable of the lost sheep and he understands all that the Lord has been saying about offense, about despising others, and about the pursuit of lost sheep.  And he came to Jesus and he said, “Lord, how often shall my brother's sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”  Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” 

The motivation to forgive others in the midst of conflict is based on how the Father has treated us in Jesus Christ, not on whether the persons who have confessed sin unto us deserve to be forgiven.  Ephesians 4:32 says, "Be kind and compassionate to one another forgiving each other, just as in Christ, God forgave you."

Have you ever considered that we cannot earn the Father's forgiveness and that we don't deserve the Father's forgiveness?  We are forgiven solely because of what Jesus Christ has done for us by the grace of God.  Can you imagine what it would be like if the Father imposed his standard on us; if we had to earn forgiveness?  He's forgiven us freely because of faith in Jesus Christ and his grace toward us.  And He asks us to forgive others the same way that He has forgiven us.  

This can be challenging in the midst of conflict because we know we've been wronged.  We feel justified in our position of withholding forgiveness, but the power to forgive does not come from our thinking the other party deserves it, or that they're worthy of it, or that they've done what we think they need to do to receive it.  The power to forgive flows from our relationship with Jesus Christ which is why going to the Peacefire in the midst of conflict is essential.  It’s why your relationship of relentless reliance on Jesus Christ is essential to walking through conflict in the transforming peace and power that the Lord provides. 

Galatians 2:20 says, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.  The life I now live in the body I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

Christ lives in you, the power to forgive lives in you.  The same spirit that raised Jesus Christ from the dead lives in you and in me as followers of Jesus Christ.  The power to forgive comes from that relationship and not from whether those we are in conflict with deserve our forgiveness. 

In Luke 23:34, Jesus said, "Father forgive them, for they do not know what they're doing," and He said that as He hung on the cross.  He forgave us when we were his enemies, when all of his friends had forsaken him.  He forgave.  And he extends that forgiveness to you and I, and asks us to take what He's given us and give it to others.  

The refusal to forgive opens the door to spiritual deception and bondage.  In Matthew 18, after Peter asks Jesus, “How many times must I forgive,” Jesus tells the parable of the wicked servants.  The parable of the wicked servants goes like this:

A servant owed his master a huge sum of money and the master called the debt due. And the servant said, “I don't have the ability to pay.  Please forgive me.”  And the master forgave him his debt. 

Well, the servant had a fellow servant, who owed him a small pittance in comparison to the amount that he owed his master. And he went to that servant, and he demanded payment.  And the servant, the fellow servant, said to the wicked servant, “I can't pay, please forgive me”.  And   servant did not forgive his fellow servant, had him thrown in prison.  And when the master heard what the wicked servant had done, he called him before him, and he said to him, I forgave you all of that debt, and you went and treated your fellow servant as you did.  Therefore, I'm going to send you to prison. I'm going to turn you over to the tormentors until you've paid the last penny.  And Jesus said in conclusion of the parable, “So will your Father do to you if you do not forgive others for their sin.”  

The father takes serious his command to forgive as we have been forgiven.  A great price has been paid for us to receive forgiveness.  And a great gift has been given for us; the power given to us to extend forgiveness.  And when we refuse to forgive, we open ourselves up to that spiritual prison to be given over to the tormentors until we've paid the last penny, until we extend that forgiveness.

So if you find yourself in a relationship, or serve others who are in a relationship, where they're bound by unforgiveness, you have a tremendous opportunity to rescue a lost sheep.  There is no follower of Jesus Christ who has the right to withhold forgiveness from another.  What He has done for us, we haven't earned; we don't deserve.  And as we spend time with a Peacefire, in a relationship of relentless reliance on Jesus Christ, He gives us the power to forgive.  And He sets the captives free.  And we have victory in the midst of conflict. 

Ken, Sande has also written Four Promises of Forgiveness.  What do we mean when we say we forgive? 

  1. The first of those promises is I will not dwell on this incident.

  2. The second is I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you because when we do that, when we say we forgive and then bring up that incident again in the future, we really haven't forgiven, we're still holding it against them.


  1. The third promise of forgiveness is I will not talk to others about this incident. 

  2.  And the fourth is I will not let this incident stand between us or hinder our personal relationship from moving forward. (Subject at times to appropriate godly boundaries.) 

So we've come to that place in the Wildfire where sin has been exposed and confronted.  Sin has been confessed and those powerful words, ‘I've sinned against you, will you forgive me?’ have been uttered.  And it brings us to that place where the Wildfire can be extinguished when the most powerful words can be stated by someone to those who have confessed their sin, ‘I forgive you’. 

God bless you. We'll see you next time.



最后修改: 2023年07月19日 星期三 08:34