Reading: 9-4 A Prisoner's Response to Prayer

A Prisoner's Response to Prayer

edited by Peter Worsley Reintegration Chaplain

 peterworsley@mccab.ca 403-275-6935, ext. 242

 I was in a very dark place in my life. I had been incarcerated for six years, had seen so much, men being beaten, stabbed, and sexually assaulted. I had been verbally abused, challenged to fight - I had little reason to believe in anything. My family had abandoned me. I had no one.

When the cell doors locked shut at night, the darkness set in. The demons of yesterday came in full force to attack me. I was frightened, alone, and desperate.

 I tried to pray - for forgiveness, for healing for my victims - only to be attacked by Satan in my every thought. I would go to the chapel whenever the Circles of Support and Accountability (CoSA) staff was visiting.

One day the Reintegration Chaplain from Bridge Ministries was there with a volunteer named Jack. We met, we shared; I cried as I felt human again for the first time in a long time.

 I asked Jack if he knew of a group who could pray for me. He said he would have a prayer circle he was involved with pray for me. When I went to my cell that night I no longer felt alone and desperate. I had some power back. When the demons came to accuse me, I rolled over and had a peaceful sleep. The demons lost their power over me. I knew I only had to wait a few days and many would be praying for me. It felt as if God had placed an angel of peace at my door.

 Why was it so important that someone prayed for me?

As I had done so much damage to innocent people, my prayer seemed weak and futile. I felt my crimes gave an opportunity for the demons to mock my prayers and taunt me; to belittle me to the point that I wanted to die. The prayers of others gave me the strength to move beyond my past and begin to heal.

I believe prison volunteers are of vital importance. I pray they will continue to engage with us in prison and after release. I challenge all prison volunteers to pray with and for one inmate. A volunteer's prayers saved my life. My thanks go out to all those who volunteer with offenders.