Today, we're going to discuss the stumbling blocks that can interfere with effective communication. We seek guidance from Romans 14:13: "Therefore, let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way." Our aim is to explore how we can share truth, meaning, love, and joy through better communication.

Meaning Barriers in Communication

Reuel Howe, a theologian and educator, discussed the concept of "meaning barriers," obstacles that prevent the effective exchange of ideas. The misconception that speaking automatically equates to successful communication often leaves people discouraged when they encounter difficulties. Effective communication, particularly in sharing Christ's love, requires concerted effort and thoughtful attention to potential barriers.

Thomas Gordon's Dirty Dozen of Communication Spoilers

Thomas Gordon, along with other experts like Carl Rogers, Haim Ginott, and Jake Gibbs, has identified behaviors that hinder conversation. Gordon's comprehensive list, known as "The Dirty Dozen of Communication Spoilers," is something we should all consider. Interestingly, many of these barriers are already highlighted in Biblical teachings.

Number Seven: Moralizing

Moralizing can be a significant issue, especially for Christian leaders who have experienced personal spiritual transformation. For example, invoking phrases like, "The Bible says you're wrong," or "God told me he wants you to do this," can undermine the opportunity for meaningful dialogue.

Number Eight: Excessive or Inappropriate Questioning

Questions like "Do you think that action was Christ-like?" often close off dialogue. Jesus himself confronted inappropriate questioning in John 8:7, challenging those without sin to cast the first stone.

Advising as a Stumbling Block

Offering unsolicited solutions can also be a problem. Instead of saying, "I think you should ask Wilma to do that ministry," try engaging in a dialogue. Ask, "Who do you think could be good for this ministry?"

Diverting the Conversation

Diverting is another communication obstacle where we shift the focus from the topic at hand. For instance, if someone says, "My daughter is struggling with fears," responding with political or generalized statements dilutes the conversation and disregards the individual's concerns.

Logical Arguments as Barriers

Focusing on facts at the expense of emotional issues can also be detrimental. Quoting statistics to assuage someone's fear of flying, for instance, may seem logical but fails to address their emotional state.

Number 12: Reassuring

Reassuring might appear comforting, but it can also distance us emotionally from the other person. General statements like "Many people have failed that exam," do not genuinely comfort or support the individual.

The 13th Roadblock: Judging Others

Finally, while recognizing these communication roadblocks can be enlightening, it's essential not to use this awareness as a tool for judgment against others.


In conclusion, Colossians 3:23 reminds us to do everything "as working for the Lord, not for men." Effective, loving communication is not automatic. It requires intentional effort, particularly within families and workplaces. The Holy Spirit inspires us to communicate with love, but it's up to us to make that communication effective.



Modifié le: samedi 2 septembre 2023, 07:38