We wrapped up our last lecture by talking about the hidden desires of the heart being the place where conflict begins, places that we can't see, and others can't see, but when those desires come to the surface, and the wildfire ignites, is often around an event that we call the fire trap of offense. 


A fire trap is a building that when it ignites, much like this photograph that I'm going to show, is a building where the it's conducive to fire, will burn quickly, and there are limited means of escape. 

The word offense, the word that's translated offense in Matthew 18, in some versions is translated to sin or to stumble, is the Greek word scandalon.  And the root meaning of the word scandalon refers to the bait stick of a trap.  Have you ever thought about offense in that way, that when you are offended, you're snared in a trap of which there are limited means of escape?

When we talk about taking offense, I want you to think about a situation where you've taken the bait because offense, we live in a world where offense is everywhere around us.  People are always taking offense.  People are always demanding apologies from someone who has offended them.  And we take great care not to offend others.  But offense is a trap.  We think we have a right to be offended because the conduct of those who have offended us is, quite frankly, offensive.  And so when we're offended we don't even think about being in a trap.  We think we are where we ought to be.  But what happens when we take offense is that we elevate our self-interest and we pass judgment on the one who offended us.  And then the third step is we justify our judgment. 

 Jesus warned against taking offense. In Matthew 18:6, He said, “If anyone causes one of these little ones”, referring to his followers, “those who believe in me, whoever causes them to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck, and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”  So by saying that offense is a trap, I'm not making light at all, that we should not be the one to cause offence.

Jesus clearly states here, “better to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around your neck than to offend one of my one of my people”.  Jesus also said in verse 18:7 that we should expect offenses to come.  He says, “Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble,” or to be offended.  “Such things must come but woe to the person through whom they come.”   So Jesus warns us not to take offense but then He says some interesting things about those who find themselves offended.

In Matthew 18:8-9, He says, “If your hand or foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away.  It's better for you to enter life maimed or crippled, than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire.  And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away.  It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and to be thrown into the fire of hell.” 

Jesus is using strong hyperbole here to illustrate the importance of staying free from the trap of offense.  In fact, the word to cut off, the word that is translated to cut off, implies the action of cutting out cut off the offending source, let it fall to the ground, and don't even pay attention to where it lays.

When we find ourselves in the trap of offense, the question then becomes, well, what do I, what am I going to do?  Am I going to justify my offense because I have a right to feel the offended, or am I going to follow the Spirit's leading and get out of the trap?  

What does it look like to get out of the trap of offense?  And what do we mean by cutting off the offending source?  Does that mean I cut off a person who has offended me?  I cut off the relationship with them?  Does it mean that I actually cut off my hand?  No, I don't think it means either of those things.  Jesus here is talking about what's caused us to get into the trap of offense, what's caused us to be offended?  What are those desires?  What are those heart issues that have caused me to take offense? 

Leaving aside for the moment, the one who's caused us to take offense and their conduct, we’re talking now about our own desires because we don't, we aren’t forced to be offended.  You cannot force me to be offended.   I choose to be offended.  You choose to be offended.  When someone does something that is offensive, it presents us with that choice. 

Am I going to take offense or am I not going to take offense?  When I take offense, do I recognize that I'm in a trap that I need to get out and I need to do whatever is necessary to remove myself from that offence? And what does that look like?  And in all of these dynamics, remember, the Lord is at work.  He's at work exposing something in my life.  Heart desire, why did I take that bait?  What was the bait?  Why was it important to me? Why was it so important to me that I took offence and what is it the Lord is wanting me to do to get free from the trap? 

These are the some of the opportunities that exist in conflict.  And as a Christian leader, in your home, in your workplace, in your church, in your business, what are the opportunities that exist when you come across others in conflict, and you see these dynamics happening, you see that someone has taken offense?  There are so many opportunities in the midst of a conflict to see the dynamics, to see the desires that are exposed, and how to respond to those as a leader, as someone who is going to sow peace.  So we look at the trap of offence in a way that is a place that we do not want to be.  

In the kingdom of this world it’s okay to be offended.  It’s encouraged to be offended about just about anything.  But in the kingdom of heaven, offence is not an option.  There's nowhere in Scripture that Jesus says we have a right to be offended.  In fact, He refused to be offended. To stay free from the trap of offense, deal with situations according to his, out of his relationship with the Father rather than out of his relationship with men and women.  And that's what we're going to talk about more in the next session. 

God bless you. We'll see you next time.



Last modified: Tuesday, July 18, 2023, 7:37 AM