How To Be More Fun

Simply put, being fun is a trait people generally appreciate in others. If you can be more fun they'll enjoy being around you more. It is something that has a time and a place though. If you're at a party, or in a joking mood, you generally want to be around fun people, and having fun yourself. If you're going on a quiet, contemplative walk with a friend, that same fun behavior from someone may not fit the situation.

Overall, I see being fun as just one social 'mode' of many people can be in. Sometimes it's the right one for the circumstances, sometimes not. This article covers the idea in more detail:

Regular Logical Mode vs. Fun Partying Mode In Social Interactions

I think there are two aspects to being more fun. There are the behaviors that actively make you more fun, and there are the traits to avoid that make you less fun.

Being more fun

When I was trying to think up all the traits I've noticed that seem to make people more fun, I realized they were all fairly vague and general. You'll see what I mean in a second. This vagueness means two things. First, as long as they're sticking to the very general principles, everyone can be fun in their own style. Your fun self can be a reflection of your normal self.

Second, the principles are relative. What I mean is, one person can apply a principle at a low level of intensity and be fun in a subdued way, which their friends may enjoy more than someone who's really over the top. Another person can apply the same principle in a more crazy, energetic way. Sometimes I get this mental image of a fun person being a loud guy standing on a table with a beer in each hand. But I think that's more a particular flavor of being fun, which you'd have to be in a certain mindset to appreciate. You can also be fun in a more low key manner, and in a style other than "Hyper, drunken party animal".

However, even though I just wrote about how everyone can be fun in their own way, this article is still using a certain meaning of 'fun', which involves having wacky, entertaining, funny times with people. If someone were to say, "My idea of having fun is to take an afternoon to quietly contemplate my garden", then this article won't line up with their use of the word. If it's not all that important to you to be more fun in the way the article is talking about, then it may not be something you need to read.

Be amusing and joke around

In one way or another, fun people are often funny. Sometimes it's because they're purposely being a comedian and trying to make their friends laugh. With other people it's more that they have a naturally amusing personality, and can't help but be entertaining as they go about their lives.

Introduce people to fun new activities and situations

Fun people also have a knack for bringing the people they're with into fun situations. Some of them just simply know good places to go and fun things to do. Others have this hard-to-pin-down ability to just get everyone they're involved with into crazy circumstances. Rather than make a normal response to an event, they'll be a bit more spontaneous and unpredictable and get all their friends involved in something memorable.

Help people have more fun themselves than they normally do

A lot of us are used to going through life at a certain level of reservedness. We may have a better time if we pushed our limits somewhat, but we're used to the default setting. Fun people are good at convincing us to let loose a little more. Sometimes it's because their own enthusiasm is infectious. At other times they have a skill for applying some light, harmless peer pressure (to get you to do something you'll like anyways). The classic example is the person dragging their more reluctant friends onto the dance floor, where they start to have a good time once they get going.

Purposely try to have fun

Some people have fun naturally. Other people, on some level at least, need to consciously try to have a good time when they have fun. Instead of quietly hanging back, they're on the lookout for things that might increase the fun they're having. Fun people are pretty skilled at seeking out good times, or creating them out of nothing.

More fun people know how to amuse themselves. Hopefully the situation they find themselves in will be fun from the get-go, but if it's not then they'll stir something up. They'll end up chatting to some new people. They'll suggest something to do. They'll inspire their friends to get into some wacky situation and see where it leads.

Get in touch with your goofy, immature side

Having fun often means being more silly and childish than normal. You have to shelve the more sober parts of yourself and temporarily regress to a goofier, freer side of your personality. It means laughing at dumb jokes and stupid antics, instead of being serious and judgmental about them. I think a lot of people use alcohol to help them get into this state, but you can get there without it.

Be a little more crazy and reckless than you would normally

Another part of being fun is being more spontaneous and uninhibited relative to your normal self. That doesn't mean you have to start throwing furniture off someone's roof or become a stereotypical frat boy idiot or anything, just that in fun situations being a bit more wacky or reckless relative to the usual you isn't seen as a big deal.

Or to use a cliche: Say "yes" to more things than you normally would. If a situation comes up where you have a chance to do something memorable and entertaining, throw caution aside and go with it. That way leads to stories you'll laugh about afterward. If you really want to, you can come up with a reason why doing pretty much anything is a bad idea. Don't let that sensibility go too far.

Take things a little further than you normally would

This point is closely related to some of the ones above. This is hard to explain, but I've noticed fun people have a tendency to push things a little further than everyone else. If everyone is joking around, they'll start making slightly more outrageous or edgy jokes. If everyone is on the dance floor, they'll start dancing in a more kooky or showy way and get everyone else to join in. Not always, but sometimes this pushing involves taking things in a slightly more risque direction.

There's often fun to be had in pushing things slightly, but some people are hesitant to go there. The fun person helps everyone get into that territory. It takes skill and experience to know just how far to take things though. If you go too far, you can come off as insensitive, or make people uncomfortable.

Have tricks and talents that make you more fun

This is a more minor point. Fun people often have all these little skills they can pull off that help other people have a good time, if only to get one cheap laugh out of them. They may know a bunch of jokes or stories, or be able to pull out some funny dances, impressions, or corny magic tricks. Sometimes people see these party tricks as cheesy and trying too hard, but they can get a good reaction too. 

Taken From http://www.succeedsocially.com/morefun

Last modified: Monday, August 6, 2018, 1:02 PM